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Am I Legend Image For Blog

Am I Legend?

Posted by Ali

Often, I feel I am a character from Dawn of the Dead! Part of a small handful of survivors, which have (so far) managed to avoid a society-destroying virus!

We live among the infected and need to recognise them by the following characteristics in order to stay ‘alive’:

  • Abbreviated or minimal vocal communication: Unlikely, to have a conversation without a 5 minute intervals between each sentences (if any conversation at all).
  • Walk slowly: Despite this, still bump into large objects and others.
  • Make little to no eye contact: Focus purely on what they crave and thirst for
  • Hunched over posture.
  • If not at home, swarm to areas with the ‘World Wide Woe’ (as I have come to code name it): Without this, they would have to function as ordinary human beings!

The main problem with this virus is that if you were to catch it, you wouldn’t even be aware that you had. In fact, you would be so unaware, that you see yourself as very sociable, have so many friends and dedicated to keeping everybody update to date with current affairs (your intimate and not so entertaining personal life).

However, I really should get on to the point as it is likely if are still reading this on one of your many digital devises, you may be already ‘one of them’. But please don’t be alarmed! You may be part of the majority I would like to call – Technology Zombies!

Today’s generation has been swept away by the miracle of modern technology. An online culture that knows where, who and what is going on before it has even happened. In the world they share, they are on top of it; up to date and connected.

But if you were to ask them ‘what did I just say?’, this makes for an even more awkward silence than the one you have been suffering in for the past 15mins when you met up for ‘coffee and a catch up’.

In boredom, I have almost slipped into the same insanity… the silence, the tedious company and the overwhelming urge to make it all go away and make sure I still have no notification after 2 months.

If you are not a Technology Zombie, or you wish to be human again, here are some tips to continue your survival, or regain your humanity.

  • Never ever forcibly remove a digital device from a technology zombie: You will definitely reach human contact, however it is an even more hideous thing to behold. Verbal abuse or injury may occur.
  • Cut it down or cut it out: Set a limit. Look on your breaks, when you are alone and never look when in company. Social etiquette dictates that when in company, you may have to actually talk to those people.
  • Keep it away: Like all addictions, you cope better when what you want isn’t sat next to you on the sofa. If you can handle the stairs after a long day, put your device on the top floor, the struggle wont be worth the bother.
  • Have an actual hobby: Civilisation survived 6,000 years before digital technology. If they could do it, why not us? There are always other things to do!
  • Meet people: No I don’t mean Digital Addicts Anonymous, just your friends. Instead of messaging, just meet.
  • Enjoy the moment: When something note worthy actually happens, don’t take a selfie… actually enjoy the moment. If your having such a fun time, taking a photo shouldn’t even cross your mind. It’s great to document a memory, but make sure it is a genuine memory your keeping and don’t ruin the moment.

Featured Image: Illustration by Steve Cutts

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